Being a big Southeastern Conference, especially Kentucky, fan I thought this was funny.
“How many college student-athletes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?”
-At South Carolina it takes 80,000. One to screw in the bulb and 79,999 to discuss how this will finally be the year that they have a decent football team.
-At Vanderbilt it takes two. One to change the bulb and one to explain how they did it every bit as well as any Ivy Leaguer.
-At Alabama it takes five. One to change it, three to reminisce about how Bear Bryant would have done it and one to throw the old bulb at an NCAA investigator.
-At Auburn it takes 100. One to screw in the bulb, 49 to talk about how they do it better than ‘Bama and 50 to realize it’s all a lie, get looped and roll Toomer’s Corner.
-At Ole Miss it takes six. One to change the bulb two to mix the drinks and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.
-At Mississippi State it takes 15. One to screw it in, two to buy the Skoal and 12 to yell, “GO TO HELL, OLE MISS, GO TO HELL!!!”
-At Georgia it takes three. One to screw in the bulb and two to phone a friend at Georgia Tech for instructions.
-At Florida it takes four. One to change it and three to figure out how to get high off the old one.
-At Tennessee it takes 10. Two to figure out how to screw it in, two to buy an orange lampshade and six to phone a radio call-in show and talk about how much they hate Alabama.
-At Kentucky it takes eight. One to screw it in and seven to discuss how much brighter it shines during basketball season.
-At LSU it takes seven – and each one gets credit for four semester hours.
-At Arkansas it takes none. There is no electricity in Arkansas.
“How many college student-athletes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?”
-At South Carolina it takes 80,000. One to screw in the bulb and 79,999 to discuss how this will finally be the year that they have a decent football team.
-At Vanderbilt it takes two. One to change the bulb and one to explain how they did it every bit as well as any Ivy Leaguer.
-At Alabama it takes five. One to change it, three to reminisce about how Bear Bryant would have done it and one to throw the old bulb at an NCAA investigator.
-At Auburn it takes 100. One to screw in the bulb, 49 to talk about how they do it better than ‘Bama and 50 to realize it’s all a lie, get looped and roll Toomer’s Corner.
-At Ole Miss it takes six. One to change the bulb two to mix the drinks and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.
-At Mississippi State it takes 15. One to screw it in, two to buy the Skoal and 12 to yell, “GO TO HELL, OLE MISS, GO TO HELL!!!”
-At Georgia it takes three. One to screw in the bulb and two to phone a friend at Georgia Tech for instructions.
-At Florida it takes four. One to change it and three to figure out how to get high off the old one.
-At Tennessee it takes 10. Two to figure out how to screw it in, two to buy an orange lampshade and six to phone a radio call-in show and talk about how much they hate Alabama.
-At Kentucky it takes eight. One to screw it in and seven to discuss how much brighter it shines during basketball season.
-At LSU it takes seven – and each one gets credit for four semester hours.
-At Arkansas it takes none. There is no electricity in Arkansas.
